Space: Need

“Between stimulus and response is a space.
In that space is the freedom and power to choose.”

Steven Covey

Space Series


You’ve been taught your whole life that humans have all these needs. I’ve been taught that all my needs are met.

Do I need oxygen? Yes. If I don’t get it every minute or two, I’m going to die. Do I have any shortage? Nope. So, do I need oxygen? My body requires it.

I’ve found that when we use the language of “I need,” for example: I need to go to the bathroom, I need to cook dinner, or I need to earn a paycheck; when we create that language; we’re creating subconscious anxiety that we’re not good enough until we accomplish that “need.”

We’re actually saying, “I need to create the thought that I’m not good enough to motivate me to do something.”

Thought of need is the thought of scarcity, of not enough. Scarcity is frightening, we scare ourselves. I’d prefer to be more free, powerful and at choice.

I prefer to say, “I want to go to the store,” or “I’m committed to get up and go to work.”  There’s much more power, and freedom in that.

Here’s something that you can do today. Just catch yourself saying, “Need to.”

You do it all the time. Catch yourself doing it, and don’t beat yourself up. It’s not about being bad for saying it.

Just catch yourself. Reflect on it, and ask yourself does it make me feel free, powerful and at choice to be needy?

Or would I rather change my thought and my language to “I want to,” “I get to,” “I’m committed to,” “I intend to?”

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